Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Eli Manning Breaks Manning Family Record for Passing the Mashed Potatoes

By James J. Hamilton
NEW ORLEANS—Sources say Eli Manning set a new Manning family record for passing the mashed potatoes at a Christmas dinner in New Orleans this afternoon. The previous record had been set at a 1999 Thanksgiving dinner by Eli's brother Peyton, who three days ago broke the NFL record for the most touchdown passes in a season. "Eli was spreading the mashed potatoes all over the table," said father Archie. "He was making it look easy," said mother Olivia, who reportedly had two helpings of mashed potatoes served up by Eli.  "I've never seen anyone pass mashed potatoes like that," said brother Cooper. Peyton still holds Manning family records for passing gravy, stuffing, ham, turkey, corn, yams, rolls, green beans, and salad.